


TTA: Four Years

by KatsInSpace



Series: Time and Time Again [5]
Category: White Collar
Genre: M/M, alternative universe, au where keller wasn't a criminal, brief reference to homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-05
Updated: 2016-10-05
Packaged: 2018-08-19 18:47:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8221166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KatsInSpace/pseuds/KatsInSpace
Summary: With Mozzie gone, Matthew now has to start supporting himself, because Neal's “job” money isn't going to last forever. So he waits for Neal and works while he does, barely doing the minimum until the next visit.





	

**Author's Note:**

> AU where Matthew Keller wasn't a criminal and stayed in Scotland. And I don't really know his history so I'm kind of making it up. Comes after Caught. The apartment is different from the one in the show. Mostly focuses on Matthew rather than Neal/Keller. Past Neal/Kate, one-sided Keller/Original Character. Warnings at the bottom. Thanks to SomethingYesterday on tumblr for being my beta.

Matthew visits him two times each week, Tuesday and Thursday. He never strays from his usual schedule no matter what. Those two hours each week is the highlight of his life. He treasures the scarce time he could spend with him. It's nowhere near what it was like when it was just the two of them, no glass separating them, but he still loves it.

Though, they can't say everything they want. They have to be careful of what they say because he knows, they _both_ know that they're watching.

Matthew can't say “I love you” nor can Neal say “You're my everything” because they'd give him shit for it. Though they manage to slip it into their conversation anyway; they don't have to say it out right for the other to understand.

All the other days of the week though, Matthew despises. He has nothing to do while he waits for four years. Mozzie's gone so he has no one to talk to. He doesn't even have a way to contact him nor any idea where he went, so he's pretty much alone in all of this. This might be the reason why he's willing to overlook the whole “going back to his ex” part.

And before anyone asks, Matthew's not jealous. He knows Neal loves him.

Eventually though, Matthew realizes that he can't just be sitting around doing nothing. It doesn't really take him that long to realize it, perhaps a week or so. Matthew starts to take into account the realities of life, that he can't just focus on him and Neal. Matthew needs to start caring for himself. He's done it before, so he knows what to do.

It's harder than he realizes despite havingtraining, experience, and a college degree. He had already been looking for a job before Neal had been incarcerated, but it takes him a few more monthsto get one. He's not paid as much as he was back in Scotland but it's something.

Matthew now has a job in retail. While he had training to become a welder, he also had a business degree. It's not really related to his past work but he'll work his way up. For now though, he works the storage. He carries heavy boxes to and from delivery trucks and helps out with inventory.

“So you're Matthew?” The driver of the moving truck says a few days into his first week at work. The man looks up from his clipboard, having just gotten the signature from the person in charge.

Matthew had just been loading something on the hand cart when the other had spoken. He doesn't stop loading but replies, “Yeah, I am.”

“Donovan, nice to meet you,” the blond had replied. “Welcome to your first week of work.”

“Thanks.”

Matthew's back to his eight hour work day, but this time, he also works weekends instead of Tuesday and Thursday. He would have thought that they didn't like him doing that, but apparently, they preferred for him to work on the weekend. He wasn't entirely sure why but never questioned it.

At first, he doesn't converse with anyone:

“Keller! Us warehouse guys are going for a drink, wanna go?”

“Sorry man, first week and all, I'm pretty tired.”

“There's this jazz band playing at the coffee shop and we've decided to go. Do you want to come with us?”

“I'm not a fan of jazz or coffee, sorry.”

Matthew tells Neal about this.

“I think you should go,” Neal encourages him.

Matthew looks at him with an odd look. “I could have sworn I told you that I don't listen to Jazz.”

“You didn't actually say it outright,” Neal informs him. “But I could read in between the lines. Still, you should make some friends. I don't want you all alone waiting for me to get out.”

So Matthew does try.

“Hey, you still going to the coffee shop with that band?” Matthew asked the cashier that had asked him a few days ago.

“We go every couple of days, why? I thought you didn't like jazz or coffee.”

“I decided to give it a try.”

“Great!” They exclaimed ecstatically. “We leave right after work.”

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

Matthew trails after them, unsure about what to say. He wasn't exactly socially awkward, he just didn't really know what to say to them. He knew nothing about them and other than work, they had no connections whatsoever.

He tried not to listen in on them but he couldn't help but hear Sarah's conversation with Todd and Amaiyah. He didn't remember exact details, but all he knew was that it was something about a dinner for couples.

“How about you Matthew?” Amaiyah asked him.

“Huh?” He asked, trying not to be too obvious about the fact that he wasn't listening.

“Dinner,” Todd stated.

“We can find someone for you if you want,” Sarah suggested. “Perhaps a double date if you are okay with it?”

Matthew just gave a smile, shrugging a little. “Sorry, but I'm taken.”

“Shame, at least for Donovan,” Amaiyah brought up.

Matthew didn't have to be told to put two and two together. He knows that Amaiyah meant that Donovan liked him. He wasn't interested though, he had Neal.

“What's her name?” Sarah prodded. “If you don't mind me asking.”

He did actually.

“We're not uh,” Matthew trailed off, unsure what to say. He couldn't tell them Neal's name, there's a possibility that they might connect it to “Neal Caffrey,” but if not, they'd still ask where he was. “We're pretty new.”

“The honeymoon phase, huh?” Todd asked with a smirk.

“You could say that,” Matthew said softly.

“You should bring her to the concert,” Sarah insisted.

“They're uh, they're busy,” Matthew told them.

It would have been nice to bring Neal somewhere, just a nice and simple date now and then, but they couldn't. At least not for another four years.

“Maybe later then,” she suggested.

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

Sometimes, Matthew would gaze at something for a bit too long. And eleven times out of ten, it would remind him of Neal.

**One.**

Matthew had been out shopping for some groceries when he stumbled upon a random aisle. He still had not been used to shopping in New York so he got a bit lost. Which had been when he came upon the art aisle.

Matthew's eyes settled upon a sketch book.

“ _What are you drawing?” Matthew had noticed Neal drawing something, eyes occasionally looking up from his paper. Matthew had been in the middle of reading a book when he had seen it._

_Neal said nothing at first, just looking up at Matthew. He gave him a big smile, turning around the paper. “Just a work of art.”_

_Matthew couldn't help the small smile that broke out on his face._

“ _I think I've managed to get it right this time.”_

Matthew snapped out of his thoughts. He needed to finish shopping.

 **T** **wo**.

Matthew stared at the lunch his friend Sarah had given him. She had said she had gotten it at a small cafe, but it looked as if it could have been a five star restaurant.

“ _I made breakfast,” Matthew heard Neal whisper in his ear, rousing him from his sleep._

_He mumbles, blinking away the blurriness in his eyes. With his partially open eyes, he looks over at Neal who was sitting right next to him. He sleepily smiles up at him._

“ _Hey,” Matthew muttered._

“ _Morning,” Neal greeted, running his hand through his hair. He cradled his head in his hands, gazing at him gently._

“ _Breakfast in bed?” He asked, a bit surprised. He looks over at the tray on their nightstand._

_Neal leans away, grabbing the tray and rests it on his lap. Matthew pushes himself up from the bed, half-sitting half-laying._

“ _It's just something I decided to make for you,” Neal brushed it off as if it were no big deal._

_Matthew stares at it. “Looks amazing,”he said with a smile. He looks back up at Neal. “Thanks.”_

“Matthew?”

Matthew snaps out of his thoughts, realizing they had been talking to him. “Sorry, what?”

**Three.**

“What was that show called again? The one your daughter watches? My nephew watches it too.”

“ _What_ is _that?” Matthew gave a little frown as he stared at the small doll Neal had brought with him._

“ _Cute isn't it?” He asked with a grin. “I saw it in the window and decided to get it.” He extends his hand, offering it to Matthew. “It reminded me of you.”_

_Matthew grabs it from him, examining the doll. “I remind you of a whale?” He questioned Neal._

“ _It's an Orca,” Neal stated._

“ _How am I a Killer Whale?” He knew Neal said it as a compliment and not an insult_ _,_ _but he wasn't sure what Neal was getting at._

“ _You're larger than life-” Matthew rose an eyebrow at his explanation. “You can handle yourself just fine, and despite what people say, you're an amazing person.”_

_Matthew let out a small smile. “In that case,” he started, taking a step closer. “You'd be a cat.”_

_Neal quirked a smile. “Independent and adorable?”_

“ _I was thinking something more along the lines of a graceful, sleek, and beautiful creature who seems to do the impossible.”_

“ _Yeah?” Neal asked suggestively._

“ _Yeah,” Matthew whispered out._

“Oh right! _That_ show!”

Matthew had to remember that Neal wasn't there, it was just him and everyone else.

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

Matthew didn't want to go to work. That wasn't a good day for him. The only good thing going for him that day was visiting Neal.

He flashes his eyes open, glaring at the alarm on his night table. He presses the button and forces himself up. He reluctantly trudges over to the bathroom to get ready for work.

Matthew's a lot moodier that day despite how much he tries to hide it. Not many people notice, though his friends surely do. He kept insisting he was fine.

And for the life of them, they couldn't figure out what was getting him so down.

He forces himself to go out through the day, faking a smile. Faking a smile until he could get to Neal.

Matthew waits from behind the glass; waiting for Neal to sit across from him. When he does, he sees him beam that wide smile.

Matthew, despite his terrible day, can't help but smile back.

“Happy Anniversary Neal.”

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

Matthew misses his parents. He knew what he had gotten himself into when he had left with Neal that day. That he wasn't allowed to contact him or else risk their lives and his own. But it had been so long since he was able to see or hear from them.

He had gone from seeing them everyday to not at all. He missed them a lot despite the fact that they could be a little to hovering, but he missed that too. His brother not so much. He was already used to not seeing him and he's still kind of glad.

Though, now that he's settled down in New York and Neal was caught, what's the worst that could happen?

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

Being in a bar again reminded him of hanging out with his old co-workers back in Scotland. Sarah, Amaiyah, Todd, and Donovan had invited him along to the bar. At least once every month, they'd go to the bar and have some drinks. Not so much that they'd black out but enough to get slightly tipsy.

Sarah and Todd were off doing something. While Amaiyah and Donovan were talking about some tv show.

“You wouldn't happen to be from Tennessee, would you?”

Matthew looks over to some guy leaning over in a seat next to him. He stares at the man with brown hair and grey eyes.

“No,” he says plainly. “Is that some sort of city?”

The man gives a short laugh. “Accent, nice,” he comments with a smile. “Are you from South England then? Because you surely Brighton up my day.”

Matthew wills himself not to groan and roll his eyes. The man's lines were absolutely pathetic, he couldn't even be bothered to get the country right. “I'm from Scotland,” he said blankly, looking back down at his drink, he takes a gulp. He silently hopes that the guy would take a hint and leave but he still persists.

“So you moved to NY recently? I'm Nate by the way.”

Matthew sighs, deciding to just play along. Making another friend wouldn't be so bad. “Matthew.”

“So Matthew, what brings you to New York?”

“I moved here with my partner,” he tells him. Matthew would tell him him some things, but not all.

He immediately notices a change in his expression.

“Partner?” Nate questioned. “They with you?”

Matthew notes that Nate had said “they” and not “she.” “No,” he shakes his head. “They're busy. I'm with friends right now.”

Nate cocks an eyebrow, smirking a little. He nods toward Amaiyah and Donovan, giving him a questioning look.

“They're busy,” Matthew said as if it were no big deal.

“Oh yeah?” Nate asks. “Do you think they'll mind if we get out of here?”

Matthew rose an eyebrow. “Why would I do that?”

Nate's expression seemed to falter for just a moment. “To go somewhere more fun of course,” he offered. “It doesn't seem like you're having much fun.”

Matthew would've thought his initial brush off would have at least deterred him in some way. Perhaps, get it into the other's mind that he wasn't interested but it looks like he was still trying. “Listen Pal,” he says for firmly, but still not trying to be rude. “I'm sorry but I'm just not feeling it right now. I just want to hang out with friends right now.”

“Alright alright,” he says, backing away little. “But hey, listen,” he grabs out a napkin, writing something down. “If you ever need someone to talk to or hang out with,” he slid it toward him. “I'm always here.”

Matthew stares at the napkin as Nate stands, walking off. He sighs, seeing Nate's phone number on the napkin. He crumples it up. He didn't need it, nor did he want it.

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

When Matthew gets home, he first sifts through his mail, sitting at his, their, dining table. It wasn't much aside from bills. He lets out a small smile when he sees a neatly hand-written letter. He tosses the rest aside, carefully opening the letter up.

On the front, it says his old address from Scotland, along with his mother's name.

_**Matty,** _

_**That's great to hear!** **I'm glad that you're all settled now, much better than** **the** **first** **time** **you sent a letter** **.** **Your father would be glad to hear it too. Despite what it seems, Andy** _ **does** _**miss you too,** **b** **ut he just won't admit it.** **Y** **ou know how he is!** _

_**A** **nyhoo,** **do you think you'll be able to** **come** **visit soon? It's been** **about** **three years since you've been here.** **We all miss you. Me terribly so.** _

_**Home hasn't changed much since you've gone.** **It's the same as ever.** **Crops are going, furniture's being built, numbers being crunch, same as always.** _

_**But I hear** **Mrs. Wilson down the street (Remember her? You were friends with her son in high school)** **and her husband a** **re having another child.** **And something so** **devastating** **too!** **Ol' Milly's is closing down! Can you believe it? We all use to go there when you and Andy were children.** _

_**M** **aybe you can come by and see it for yourself. Maybe even save it?** _

The handwriting changes.

_**How have you been Matthew? Your mother practically lights up whenever we see your name in the mail. She's /always/ reads it herself first before letting me and Andrew have a go.** _

_**It's good to hear that you're seeing new things. Always being here in boring, old Scotland, you won't get to see much.** _

_**I hope you'll be home for the holidays this years. But it's understandable that you might have to miss it again, plane tickets /are/ expensive.** _

The handwriting changes again.

_**Sounds like a blast.** _

_**Come home soon.** _

Matthew stands up to go find some paper and pencil. He wanted to write them back as soon as possible.

Seeing their letters were pretty much the only happiness he had nowadays. Always seeing Neal behind glass was kind of getting him down.

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

“Happy Birthday!”

Matthew smiled, looking around the room. One of his friends had decided to throw a barbeque for him, inviting all of Matthew's friends over. After hearing that he didn't have a “proper birthday party,” Jon decided to throw him one.

Matthew smiled down at the sloppily made cake. Despite not looking good, he appreciated them trying to make it from scratch. It was a lot more personal than having a store-bought cake. On the cake was the words “Happy Birthday Matt!” The candles “3” and “0” were lit on the cake.

He leans over to blow out the candles. “Thanks everyone,” he said with a smile.

“Time to cut the cake!” Someone shouted from within the room.

Sarah started cutting the cake, serving it out to everyone. Mathew smiled a thanks as he was given a piece.

“It ain't the best, but-” Donovan just shrugged instead of finishing. He but his piece.

Matthew ate a piece. “I still appreciate it Don, thanks.”

His friend just smiled back.

It wasn't nearly as perfect as he would have liked, but he was still very glad for everything. He would have liked for Neal to be here too but that couldn't be helped.

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

“Please Matt! My date canceled last minute and it's a couple's night!” Donovan begged.

Matthew sighed. “You know I'm already in a relationship Don,” he tells him.

“It'll be just as friends, I promise,” he kept insisting. “Todd and Sarah will be there too! I just _can't_ miss this concert.”

Matthew lets out a deep breath. “Fine,” he says before Donovan let out a thanks. “Just let me ask my partner first.”

Donovan beamed. “Thanks so much Matt!”

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

“I'm starting to think you're not actually in a relationship,” Donovan said aloud, when waiting outside the concert hall with Todd and Sarah.

“Excuse me?” Matthew asked, sounding offended as he looked at him.

“You always talk about partner but we've never seen them,” he notes.

“We've known you for three years,” Sarah points out. “No picture, no meeting, no nothing.”

Matthew knew this would eventually come up. “Would I lie to you?” Matthew says half-jokingly.

“Probably,” Sarah replied immediately.

“I _am_ in a relationship,” Matthew continue to say.

“What's their name?” Donovan asked. “We should at least know their name.”

“What would you do if I was lying the whole time?”

“Then I'd ask you out.”

Matthew rose an eyebrow. “You said we'd be going as friends.”

That's what he had told Neal.

“ _I also I needed to ask you something.”_

“ _What is it?” Neal tilted his head, looking a little concerned._

“ _It's nothing too bad,” Matthew brushed off as if it were no big deal. Which shouldn't be, but he didn't know why he was getting a bit worried. “_ But some friends are going to a concert and Don's date canceled last minute. They invited me to come along with them.”

“ _Sure,” Neal immediately agreed. “I don't see why you need to ask me though.”_

“ _It's this weekend.”_

_Matthew could tell that Neal was trying to hid his feelings from him. He knew that Neal was uneasy about it. And considering the concert is on Valentine's Day, of course Neal would be uneasy._

“ _Just tell me if you don't want me to go, and I won't,” Matthew informs him._

“ _No, no,” Neal denied weakly. “Go. It's fine Matty; just as friends, right?”_

“ _Of course.”_

“And we are,” Donovan claims. “But I wouldn't be against us dating.”

“While I'm flattered,” Matthew continues. “I actually _am_ taken.”

“If you're worried about what we'll think if you're dating a guy,” Sarah starts. “We don't mind if you do.”

“Amaiyah won't either,” Todd pointed either.

“I'm not,” Matthew claimed. He actually was, but it was nice to hear that he wouldn't have to worry about that. “I _am_ in a relationship.”

“Then what's their name?” Donovan pried again.

Matthew pondered for a moment. Would it really be that bad if they knew Neal's first name? There had to be a lot of Neals in the city, not just “Neal Caffrey.”

“His name is Neal,” Matthew tells them.

Donovan went silent.

“Is “Neal” also the reason we can't visit your place?” Sarah asks.

“He's actually away on business,” Matthew lies.

“For three years?” Todd asks, face scrunching up.

“His company had him work in a different country for awhile,” Matthew continues. “He should be back within this year.”

“So we get to meet him?”

Matthew gave them a smile, silently unsure. “Yeah.”

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

“You have a nice place.”

Matthew had been reluctant to bring them to his home but again, what was the harm? They were his friends and he should be able to trust them.

“Thanks. Does anyone want a drink?” He pulls open his fridge as Sarah, Todd, Amaiyah, and Donovan take a seat.

“Just water,” Sarah asks.

“Water,” Donovan asked plainly.

“Water, thanks,” Amaiyah said with a smile.

“What do you have?” Todd asked.

“Juice,” he started to list off as he took out four glasses and filled them with water. “Cola, milk.” He turns around, placing a glass in front each of them and keeping one for himself.

“Cola for me.”

Matthew turns around, grabbing a can for Todd.

“How long have you lived here?” Amaiyah asks.

Matthew takes a seat, trying to recall the time they moved in. He and Neal were together for barely a year when they had decided to “settle down,” for the lack of a better term.

“ _I can tell you're unhappy.”_

_Matthew shifts slightly, turning his head to stare at Neal. He rose his eyebrow, giving him a look. He didn't really want Neal to know how he felt about everything but he Neal would be able to see right through him anyway. “What makes you say that?”_

“ _It's subtle,” Neal says softly, looking at him with a gentle look. “And I know you don't like me doing what I do.” He pauses and Matthew tenses. “But I don't want you to leave-”_

_Matthew notes that “me” was heavily implied._

“ _I'd do anything for you to stay.”_

 _It was true that Matthew_ did _miss his home. He missed his parents and the few friends he made. Even though he was reluctant to admit it, he had also missed getting up everyday and forcing himself to work. All the traveling and niceties of not having to worry about money was very exhilarating, but too much of it started to get him down._

_Yes he liked seeing new places and experiencing new things with Neal, but more often than not, he's usually hanging around the hotel, doing nothing and hiding away from the people chasing them. He didn't have anything to do and he just wasn't the type of person to just relax all day._

“ _I won't leave,” Matthew tells him, turning his entire body to face Neal. He brushes his hand against Neal's cheek._

_Neal just kept looking at him with a worried expression. “Is that more out of necessity or want?”_

_Matthew says nothing, knowing he couldn't lie to Neal._

_Neal sighs, sitting up. He brings his knees up to his chest and buries his head in his hands._

“ _Neal,” Matthew sighs as he sits up, inching closer to him. “I do love my time with you, that much is true, but we hardly have any time together. You're always off doing missions and you know that I don't want to join in you these types of “dates”.”_

_Neal doesn't say anything at first. He looks up at him, bringing his head up. “How do you feel about New York?”_

_Matthew furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “What?”_

“ _New York,” Neal repeats, turning his body and taking his hands. “We can settle there, buy an apartment. I'd get a job for you, and I don't mean my usual jobs either.”_

_Matthew rose an eyebrow. “You'd do that?” He asks, sounding slightly surprised._

_Neal nods with a small smile. “So?”_

_Matthew pondered for a moment. “Sure, okay.”_

_After moving to New York, hardly even a bag with them, Neal and Matthew had immediately went off to go find an apartment. It took awhile, and after searching dozens of apartments in various locations, they found it._

_It had been a small apartment on Bay Meadows St, in Scarsdale New York. It wasn't nearly as fancy as the other places he and Neal went to, but Matthew liked it even more. Perhaps it had been because it reminded him of his old house; small living room, average sized rooms, and a fair sized kitchen. Of course, there were still a few differences between the apartment and his home._

“ _This one,” Matthew had said aloud._

They'd barely been living there for a month before Neal had been sent to prison.

“Just over three years,” Matthew answers.

Meaning that Neal only had a year left before he could return to him.

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

For three years straight, Matthew had been visiting Neal on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Without a fault, it they'd see each other on those two days, and on special occasions, three days each week. If he could help it, he would have never strayed from his schedule.

“Please Matthew,” Sarah begged. “I'm should be back by Wednesday but Amaiyah can only take over for me on Monday. I know you never work on a Tuesday or Thursday, but this is important.”

Matthew didn't take long to decide. “Sure.”

He could always just visit Neal on Monday. Sarah had needed to go to a funeral out of state, and he couldn't say no.

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

Matthew waited as they examined his passport. He didn't really have any other identification on him. While he had been trying to go for his driver's license, he didn't exactly have a car to use so he didn't bother. While he had his state license, he just preferred the passport over that.

After being approved, Matthew was lead over to the sign in.

“Neal Caffrey?” Matthew asked.

The guard looked over a list before looking back at him. “There's already a visitor with him-”

Matthew didn't show it but he had bit a bit confused. As far as he knew, he had been the only one visiting Neal. He knew Mozzie didn't want to visit him because it would “put him in the system.” Matthew did not not know anyone else who would come by.

“Would you like to join them? Or do you want to wait? Their time is almost over.”

“I'll wait,” Matthew stated before turning around to the seating area.

Matthew didn't wait long before the guard called over for him. He looks up, seeing a brunette with light grey eyes around his height walking out. He didn't recognize her, nor did she, judging by the lack of response from her.

Matthew stands. He leans over to sign his name. He takes a quick glance over the sign in seat, looking for Neal's name. The newest sign-in just before his, had been the name “Kate Moreau.”

Matthew pales. He immediately knew who Kate was, Neal's ex.

Leaning away, he steals a glance at the other page, from one week before. He sees her name again.

Matthew quickly puts it together and realizes, ' _She's been seeing him every week._ ' He feels his chest tighten. He glances at the guard who leads him to Neal, following closely behind. It had been the usual guard he saw every other time he visited.

“You usually come on Tuesdays and Thursdays,” he notes.

“I was busy.” Matthew was unable to say more, he needed to recollect himself before facing Neal.

Matthew had been looking forward to seeing him all weekend, but now, he couldn't find anything he would want to talk about. Not after seeing Kate.

Matthew glances at the glass window, seeing Neal's surprised expression. It quickly fades away into a beaming smile.

“Matt,” Neal greeted happily. “Hi.”

Neal looks very happy to see him, as if these visits from him were the only thing he had to look forward to – which probably had been the case, considering prison must have been really bad – but his mind goes back to Kate.

There was a possibility that Neal had looked the same as he was with him whenever Kate came by. Just like to Matthew himself, Kate had been visiting Neal every week, albeit not as often. This wasn't a complete irrational thought, Matthew had reasoned. He remembers Mozzie questioning Neal about his reasoning for seeing Kate again. He had practically confirmed it himself; he still loved her.

With Kate visiting as long as he had, she would have no other reason to visit if she didn't love him back.

Matthew takes a seat, unable to smile back.

Neal immediately notices, smile falling. “Matthew?”

Matthew didn't know what to say. He didn't really have anything on his mind at that moment other than six words.

“I think we should break up.”

-.-Time and Time Again-.-

“I'm sorry Matthew,” Donovan mutters as he helps him pack up his things.

“Can we ask what happened?” Sarah asked softly, also organizing everything.

Matthew shakes his head. “Sorry, it's too soon.” He didn't want to tell them what happened, not ever. Even after almost two months, he still couldn't bear it; living in the apartment they bought together didn't help either. He stops, looking straight at Donovan. “But thanks again for letting me stay in your guest room.”

“What are friends for, right?” He gave an encouraging smile.

Matthew went back to stacking a few boxes.

He didn't actually have much but he had trouble sorting through everything and giving stuff up. He stops, sighing.

“Maybe you should take a vacation,” Amaiyah suggested softly. “For the entire time you've been here, you haven't taken one.”

Matthew opened his mouth to turn it down but stopped. Maybe he did need a vacation. It would be nice to see his parents again. Maybe even Andrew too. “I'll think about it.”

“Our bosses would give it to you,” she continued. “You're a hard worker and you have all your vacation time piling up.”

Matthew gave a small smile. “I won't be gone too long.”

“You deserve it,” Donovan insisted.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Criticism welcome. My tumblr is ElectronicSpace.  
> Let me know if you want to see something specific in this AU.  
> Warnings: References to homophobia.  
> Their address was from a random address generator, so I am unsure if it is a real place or not. I don't know how prison visitation works.


End file.
